Top 5 TV Theme Songs

Few things in life are as comforting as the sound of your favorite show's theme song. Once upon a time, television theme songs were vital parts of the whole viewing experience. They've basically been completely eliminated today with most shows playing a couple of bars on the piano and getting on with the show.
My top five TV theme songs are all songs that not only fit their respective shows perfectly but are also songs that I would (and do) actually listen to on a regular basis.

1. Cheers - "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" by Gary Portnoy
The number one spot was a tough pick but this song just has it all. Nostalgia, sappy lyrics, catchy tune. If you love this show, you're guaranteed to feel a little something in your heart everytime you hear this song and that's the sign of a great TV theme song.

2. The Jeffersons - "Movin on Up" by Janet Dubois
I dare you, DARE you to sit still when this song starts playing. This song perfectly sets the mood for jive talkin tycoons, sassy housekeepers and white guys being called "honkey". It doesn't get much better than this.

3. The Greatest American Hero - "Believe it or Not" by Joey Scarbury
Many people, sadly, know this song only as the song George tried to leave on his answering machine on Seinfeld. It is, in fact, one of the most perfectly cheesy theme songs of all time. Listening to this song makes you instantly feel like a little kid running around with a cape on.

4. The Wonder Years - "With a Little Help from My Friends" by Joe Cocker
Yes, I realize this is a real song (and a cover of a Beatles song at that) but it has become so associated with The Wonder Years, I figured it was ok to use here. Another heavy-on-nostalgia pick, this one will make you wish for simpler days when all that worried you was if Whinny would finally get with Kevin.

5. Welcome Back, Kotter - "Welcome Back" by John Sebastian
A theme song so good they actually changed the title of the show for it. This song, which eventually went to #1 on the Billboard charts, was written on a whim by Sebastian while he was writing a different theme for the show. The producers liked it so much, they changed the show title from "Kotter" to "Welcome Back, Kotter"

Honorable Mentions:
The Dukes of Hazzard
The A-Team
Sanford and Son

Thanks to everyone who posted last week. Tell your friends and let's get this party going.

Top 5 Worst Songs of 2005

We'll start things off with one subject everybody loves to disagree about, music. I for one love pop music. I love catchy songs with great production that are fun to listen to. I may sound like an old man, but pop music in recent years has been absolute garbage and 2005 was no different. These are the five worst songs from last year that dumb American teenagers were too dumb to hate.

1. Don't Cha - The Pusscat Dolls - The prototype for an awful pop song. Stupid lyrics, untalented singers and one of the un-catchiest choruses I've ever heard. At least there's still the heartwarming message it delivers: you should leave your girlfriend because I'm more sexually adventurous.
   
2. Candy Shop - 50 Cent featuring Olivia - The most overrated entertainer in America delivered quite a few forgettable singles this year but I chose this one for a few reasons. First, it's just plain bad. Bad production, bad chorus, and without a doubt the most vulgar song to ever hit number one on the charts. Not only is it bad, it's not even creatively bad; the song is basically a note-for-note-copy of 50's equally lame hit Magic Stick.
   
3. My Humps - Black Eyed Peas - This will go down in history as one of those inexplicable cultural brain farts. Years from now we will all struggle to explain to our children what we thought was so great about "My lovely lady lumps".
   
4. Over and Over - Nelly and Tim McGraw - This is easily the worst idea for a song ever. You could perhaps see how some record executive would think "Gee, teenage girls like Tim McGraw. Teenage girls like Nelly. Let's put them together." Teenage girls probably like ketchup and ice cream too but that doesn't mean they go well together.
   
5. Outta Control - 50 Cent featuring Mobb Deep - I've already picked on this talentless hack but I had to mention this song in particular. Producer Dr. Dre has been one of the most innovative producers in hip-hop but 50 Cent's mediocrity seems to have rubbed off. This is without a doubt the worst production of any pop song I've ever heard. There's not an ounce of entertainment in this record and yet it still ended up in the top ten.